02 May 2006
project: golden god
even before i started with the masteral program in which i am endlessly being made to reflect about my creative process, i've already been aware of where my stories come from. their germs, the things that get me started in the first place, are simple "what ifs." i would just be driving, or sitting on the john and my mind would start wandering into the wonderful world of self-absorbed fantasy. "what if a homosexual is barren?" "what if the person whom i feel strongly for is about to get married?"the rest of them, the rest of the stories, are brought forth by my spactacular talent in lying. the art of fiction, ladies and gentlemen.
* * *
this, my journal is creative nonfiction. familiar essays, mostly, so don't be deceived by the seemingly bogus twists. i try my best not to lie here, and this is what will actually immortalize my memoirs under suspense/science fiction/fantasy. or in the archives of the local asylum.
anyways, the may 1 holiday created a long weekend and while everyone was preparing for a grand getaway (i can't even begin telling about the pain of foregoing a boracay trip just because i cannot generate funds. grrr) i had to be contented with the prospect of having to achieve that tan i've always lusted for by checking in at Westin and lie down by the pool, the pool which is by manila bay. i figured that that would be the next best thing to a beach, the manila bay sun. (i just have to spray some air-freshener every so often.)
fortunately, this pathetic holiday idea was saved by the forever destination of bored kids who just have to get away from the city: subic bay. okay fine, it's not really the forever destination of bored kids in general, its our forever destination, or in this case fallback plan, as bored kids when we have to get away from the city. the other one, the farther destination, would be baguio but we can't get tans there, could we?
the beaches inside Subic Freeport were full. but if they weren't (we checked out two-miracle beach and all hands beach), i don't think we would have paid our ways inside anyway. i don't think the shore would have been able to accomodate me--to lie down on it would mean having my head hitting the foundation of the picnic pavilion while the crashing waves ate up to my thighs.
okay, it was a misnomer--there was no shore. just sea. and people. and more people. and smoke coming from the grill where some exotic sea creature were being cooked.
so we ended up in the yacht club poolside where, for almost three hours, i lied down under the sun. beside me were hot chicks with bodies inherited from aphrodite in the color of glazed pretzels. they were lounging about and talking about their tans. they were actually nice. and then their seven year old daughters came running by the bay chair area.
"they're superhuman. i admire them," said ler.
"those are prom babies," i said.
* * *
while i was using every fiber of patience and eq i had in me to keep myself under that sun, glen and ag were hiding under an umbrela. every so often, i would come up to ask them if i've tanned a bit yet. the answer would constantly be "no."
when we were walking, ag was scandalized by my color, or lack thereof. "you look like a foreigner." this startled me cos observations like these don't really come from fellow filipinos, right. "when you're under the sun," she qualified--something to do with glare and stuff. before that, she did not get why i had been obssessing over getting a tan. she just did not get why there are people who would kill themselves just to get dark. well, she had an epiphany and that's when she became supportive of my "project: golden god."
ler, on the other hand, just wanted to have his color evened out. so we had to endure hours under the sun for these endeavours. when we finally gave up--i wasn't able to flip anymore so my back is pale--we went back to the umbrella where our sun-o-phobic friends belittled our tans. they weren't exactly lying though when they said that my efforts yielded nothing more than a hint of rosiness.
of course, this was frustrating. so while they were wading--ten minutes tops--ler and i decided to play a prank on them. when they come back, we'd pretend to notice how "darker" they got. since my talent in "fiction" remains to be unchallenged in this group, i was tasked to set up the prank. so the minute they got back i just kinda squinted and acted hesitant. finally, i asked ag if she could remove her watch--for a little bit of drama. as it turned out, i did not need to practice my talent in lying anymore; behind that timegear was a very deep tanline.
talk about unfair--and ag agreed with this observation while she stomped around cursing the sun.
* * *
while under the umbrella, we observed people and have come to agreement that in the beach, or by a very exclusive pool, there are two kinds of people you would like to look at.
the first one is the very famous "ebi." ebi is japanese for shrimp, and when you eat shrimp, you throw the head. so to state the obvious, an ebi is a person with a breathtaking body and an unfortunate-looking visage. there was an ebi right beside our table and if he wasn't busy catching all the uv rays into his mighty mighty mighty form, he kept on posing while snow white, his girl friend, took his gross pictures.
the other type of person was the "kani," or crab. cos to us, crabs just look like walking heads. i'm sure you get this one.
the question, however: which of the two would you rather date?
i wish i had a witty answer for this.
* * *
before finally hitting the road, glen insited that we recreate an old picture that was taken there at the yacht club lobby some seven years ago, or when we were still fresh, or are still in freshman college. i'm only writing this because i would like to post two of these pics. i'm going to ask glen for a copy of that old picture and see how we've changed since then. notice how project: golden god failed.
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